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The mother of 2 girls murdered by their father on Christmas Day 2 years ago gave an emotional victim impact statement in BC Supreme Court in Victoria Tuesday morning.
Sarah Cotton's ex-partner, Andrew Berry, has been found guilty of stabbing Chloe, 6, and Aubrey, 4, numerous times on Christmas morning 2017 while he had custody of them.
Cotton spoke in front of a packed courtroom -- sometimes weeping, sometimes sobbing -- as she expressed the depth of grief and loss she feels.
She described her loss as a nightmare she can never wake up from, and says since the murders she has struggled to understand "an egregious act that is incomprehensible."
Cotton says her girls were helpless and defenceless, and she goes over the brutality of their deaths over and over again in her mind. She says it's hard to understand how their father was capable of committing such a horrific, unimaginable act, when all the girls did was love him.
She told the judge she is heartbroken imagining how they spent the last days of their lives, not fed or cared for by their father, who had run up such enormous gambling debts his power had been cut off. Calling them the centre of her world, Cotton deals with guilt and blame, wondering if there is more she could have done to save them.
Cotton has recurring nightmares of trying to keep the girls away from Andrew, and experiences profound pain and sadness -- especially at this time of year. She says she misses their energy, giggles and "little footsteps." And coping with the loss has affected her health and finances.
The judge will decide on parole eligibility and whether Berry will serve his 2 life sentences concurrently or consecutively. Cotton told Madam Justice Miriam Gropper she dreads the day she has to begin attending parole hearings, dredging up the pain, trauma and psychological harm along with it.
There were 14 victim impact statements in all delivered by relatives, family friends, neighbours, and there were community impact statements from the girls' schools and from the Mayor of Oak Bay.
The Crown is asking for no parole eligibility for between 21 and 24 years, and for the sentences to be served concurrently.
The Defence is asking for parole eligibility to be set at between 15 to 20 years.
As the submissions wrapped up Berry was asked if he had anything to say. He responds he does not. The sentence will be handed down Thursday morning.